If you're looking for a new tattoo...

Zoetica Ebb takes commissions, then shares them on her blog. The first and third images below are designs she created specifically for herclients. The middle one is just one of her drawings, but it's the piece I'd most want as a tattoo, if I had to chose any of her artwork.

Oh, and FWIW, she designs iPhone cases, too.

Silvergasm

I found these pictures by following a link from Ulorin Vex's Deviant Art gallery, where she models some other designs from this fashion house. I think you can see why I chose this set over hers, though. You can imagine what the one at the top of this post did to me. ;-P

As a whole, this set reminds me of trilby else's story Golden. His brainwashed Venusian warriors don't look quite like this, but you could certainly apply their backstory to these gals. They're so obviously seducing each other into deeper trance; and once their Mistress is satisfied with them, she'll send them out to enslave more women. You'll find plenty of conversion candidates on the designer (Anillarte)'s website.

The photographer is Rebecca Saray.

The good news and the bad news

Bad news first: Chapter 1 of "How Did It Come to This?" didn't make it into this week's EMCSA update because Simon thought it didn't have enough overt MC content. He asked me to send him more of the story.

Thus the good news: I've just sent him the second chapter, so that means you'll probably get the first two sections of the story in the next update. They're only 4,000-5,000 words each, so I don't think that will be too much for anyone to read in a single week.

Honestly, I was torn myself about whether or not chapter 1 had enough MC to post alone. The content is there, but it's pretty subtle, and you won't understand what's happening until the end of chapter 4. On the other hand, you won't have any trouble spotting the MC in chapter 2...or the sex, either. ;) Part 1 is mainly humor. And strippers. ;P

I can't help being disappointed that Simon withheld my story, but I understand his point of view (and I'm glad to know he really reads my stuff ;)), so I can't complain. I just feel bad for anyone who was looking forward to starting on "How Did It Come to This?" this week. To make it up to you, here's a rerun of the clip that launched the whole story for me:

Would China Mieville really destroy the world?

That's the question I kept asking myself as I made my way through Kraken (If you missed my earlier post on the topic, here it is).On the one hand, the three previous Mieville novels I'd read were pretty grim; but on the other, Kraken started off funny and got even funnier as it went along. Really, would an author who gives his protagonist access to a working Star Trek phaser let that protagonist (not to mention everyone else on the planet) die a fiery death? Well, this is China Mieville we're talking about, so I just wasn't sure.

Now I have my answer, so the only remaining question is how much to tell you. I don't want to spoil the book for anyone, but some of you might feel like Lady K. She read Perdido Street Station at my recommendation and hated the ending so much that she was ready to swear off Mieville completely unless I told her Kraken was a safe read. So, Lady K, here's your answer: YES. By all means, check out this book.

When I blogged about the novel at the halfway point, I said it reminded me a lot of Neil Gaiman, especially Neverwhere and American Gods. I left Anansi Boys out of that post only because it seemed a little redundant to mention when I'd already name-checked American Gods. Now I feel like I have to include it, because Kraken ended up being more like Anansi Boys than American Gods. I say that for a number of reasons, but most of them involve spoilers, so all I'll tell you here is this: a) AB is funnier than AG, while still retaining plenty of horror; and b) Billy Harrow is a lot like Fat Charlie, both in personality and in character arc.

Hmm, I wonder if Gaiman has read much Mieville (I don't have to wonder the opposite, because it's just so clearly true). Maybe they even know each other. Wouldn't it be interesting to have dinner with the two of them together?

I know some hardcore Mieville fans look down on Kraken because it's more lightweight than his Bas-lag novels, so I guess that means I'm not a hardcore fan. But I'm okay with that because it means I got to enjoy a fun novel with real emotional weight, fantastic characters, terrifying villains, hundreds of geeky in-jokes, and "confirmation" of a personal theory I've always held about Star Trek's transporter technology. ;) So what if the ending didn't make me want to stick my head in the oven? Is that a bad thing?

P.S.: The picture at the top of this post doesn't really have anything to do with Kraken, but you didn't really want to see that boring old book cover again, did you? ;) I thought you'd appreciate a bit of stuntkid art instead.

Whew!

Well, folks, my newest story is in the pipeline. I just sent the first chapter off to Simon, so it should show up in the next EMCSA update. For some reason, this one took more polishing than most of my stuff, but it was worth it. I really like the way it came out in the end.

The story will have four chapters in all, and if you've been following my blog for awhile, you probably have an inkling of the plot already. In fact, if you've been following my blog long enough, you might even know who the (very thinly) disguised MC'er is. ;) But I'm not going to make it too easy for you to put everything together. I'll just say that I dropped my most recent hints in a May 2011 post, but the idea first occurred to me over a year ago. Yes, I know that's a lot of ground to cover, but if anyone is bloodyminded enough to try, keywords will be your friends. ;-)

For the rest of you, I'll just give you the title to look out for: "How Did It Come to This?", and the story blurb: "A hockey player signs on for a reality show and finds himself paired with a flamboyant figure skater."

You've probably figured out by now that the story is cyan, but I think most of my regular readers are fine with that. Besides, it's a damn funny story, if I do say so myself. ;-) I hope you'll enjoy it.

You're welcome.

The current top entry on Apnea's blog is a flickering mishmash of images: Apnea and at least two other models doing various things in tubs and on beds and with an inflatable doll. The pictures go by too quickly for you to get a good look at any of them, but they certainly are tantalizing...at least, until the flickering gives you a migraine.

Thank goodness for Microsoft GIF Animator, a freeware program you can download from CNet, if you're so inclined. I finally got so tired of wondering what was going on that I saved Apnea's animated GIF and took it apart one image at a time. It turned out to have19 pictures total, each separated by an empty black square. Turning them into GIF's had created a little white noise, which I fixed easily enough, and then I decided to turn them over to you for your enjoyment. You're welcome. ;)

Not quite the right kraken apocalypse

Well, I finally got the chance to buy China Mieville's latest, Kraken, over the weekend. I've been devouring it ever since, and I'm about halfway through right now (I'd probably go faster if I weren't still polishing my next EMC story).

Folks, this is a very different kind of Mieville novel. For one thing, it's not what I was expecting, which was a modern spin on H.P. Lovecraft. This isn't a Cthulhu mythos tale at all, although there's been one joking reference to the Elder God so far.

Actually, there are a lot of jokes in this novel, and that surprises me as much as anything else. Who knew China Mieville had a sense of humor? The biggest source of wisecracks is Collingswood, a constable assigned to an under-the-radar paranormal division of the London police. She looks like a blonde Amy Winehouse, dresses like someone posing as a police officer for a costume ball, and has a seriously bad attitude. I love her.

But about the plot (Funny how that's never the first thing I talk about, eh?). It revolves around a stereotypically impossible crime: the theft of a giant squid, still in its case, from the depths of the Natural History Museum. The squid and the museum are real, but I doubt that Billy Harrow, the protagonist of Kraken, was involved in the preservation of the actual beast. Anyway, he's the one who discovers it missing, and for some reason that makes him very important to a bunch of scary and not-so-scary denizens of what Neil Gaiman would call "London Below."

Actually, I see a lot of Gaiman influence in Kraken (mostly from Neverwhere and American Gods) - and a lot of Clive Barker influence, too (mostly Weaveworld). Mieville has come up with some seriously freaky villains so far, and I don't even know who the real squid thief is yet. It might be someone I've already met, or it might not.

All I know right now is that the squid's disappearance seems to herald the end of the world...but not the right end of the world, according to a cult that actually worships giant squids. Thus the quote at the top of this blog entry. Yes, it is a quote. Like I said, who knew China Mieville had a sense of humor?

I have no idea whether that humor will carry through to the end of the novel or not, but I hope it will. And I hope Collingswood survives, too. She could use a novel of her own. ;)